The only angle left
Lately, too many people have been showing off their reading. With obscure, impressive, and even the too-stultifyingly-dull-to-finish books already taken, we felt the only niche left for us was the embarrassing personal anecdote (somehow we always end up with that one, don’t we?) So here goes – our list of literary crushes and true loves:
The ones I now shudder to think of:
Ned Nickerson – Old Ned was pretty much the only reason I read whatever number of Nancy Drew books I did read. Couldn’t stand the girl, who I thought recognized a clue only if there were a big neon arrow screaming ‘look here for clue’, and even then she was very likely to mistake the neon sign for the clue placed directly below it. The boy friend was definitely hot, but in the long run, not hot enough to make me tolerate the ditsy she-sleuth.
Rhys Williams, the Welsh hottie from Bloodline. Karthik mentioned that he doesn’t remember there being any men in a Sheldon novel, and if they were around, they were no more than side kicks. That precisely is the point. And Rhys was the side kick I dreamed of having when I grew up and inherited a pharmaceutical giant (of course, the fact that no one in my family was even a medical rep, leave alone owning a pharma giant was besides the point. I had faith that some cousin or uncle would manage to get their hands on one, and promptly give it to me, of course).
Captain Hastings – I know what you’ll say – ewwww, right? The man was old enough to be my grandfather, etc. But he was definitely cooler than Dr. Watson, and younger too, at least in my mind. And I’d be lying if said I never wondered how I’d look like with Titian-colored hair.
Supporting roles, but dreamboats nonetheless
Julian What’s-his-name, the oldest of the Famous Five, who marked the beginning of my fascination with strong silent males
Frank Hardy – And the strong-silent-male phase continues. I would’ve traded Ned Nickerson in a second for a shot at Frank Hardy, though.
Paul Drake – it was a toughie to choose between Perry Mason and his gangly, loose-limbed side-kick, but the “gangly, loose-limbed” bit was too much to resist. Initially, don’t think I was quite sure what that meant, and took considerable pains to imagine how a loose-limbed person might look like. But that he seemed to like ‘draping’ himself on to chairs, and that he always picked the most comfy seat in any room settled things for me. Mason was smart and articulate, but always wore stuffy suits. Paul, on the other hand, seemed like a guy you could hang out with.
Dr. Stephen Maturin – from the Patrick O’Brian novels. Lucky Jack may be the man to have on your side if you ever find yourself in a sea-battle with pirates or the French, but Dr. Maturin, apart from being adventurous and a doctor and a super spy (there is no end to this man’s accomplishments!), didn’t have his “sea-legs” (and I was just the same – no, not an adventurous doctor super spy – I refer to the sea-legs bit!). He could converse intelligently on a wide range of topics from underground revolutions to Darwin and played the cello besides. That I would probably get to see him only once in every three or four years, if that, didn’t feel like a disadvantage then, and now, it only feels like a big plus. So what do you know, the old doc continues to be a winner.
Love conquers all
Harry Street, from the Snows of Kilimanjaro. I was going to be “the one”, you see, for old Harry. He was smart, well-read, and had seen the world. That he was rotting to death seemed romantic then. Ah the follies of youth.
Clichés
I won’t bother to go into the why’s behind these:
Sydney Carton
Fitzwilliam Darcy
Aragorn
The purely academic
This whole list is one of impossibilities, but even within such a list, there are a few that are utterly impossible. But then, such knotty problems are what long summer vacation months are for.
Captain Haddock – the one cartoon character I think I’d have had some fun with. I’d have gotten him drunk every evening and listened to him swear all night.
Gally Threepwood – Feels like sacrilege to entertain such base thoughts about a Wodehouse character, but who doesn’t want some sweetness and light for themselves?
Pongo Twistleton – Gally is the epitome of wishful thinking, and Pongo the workable alternative. The man isn’t as utterly lost to reason as many PGW creations are (they’re all adorable, but batty as hell), but can be talked into outrageous behavior. Perfect.
Please come back for the “female” list from Karthik.
Comments (6 comments)
Julian?! Really?
Falstaff / March 21st, 2007, 9:55 pm / #
Yes, Julian. Told you this was embarrassing.
DoZ / March 22nd, 2007, 8:59 am / #
Comrade Doz:
Been reading your blog page for the past couple of weeks. Enjoyed reading some of them…though you seem to have some weird tastes though…
What are you complaining about, when you get a chance to travel from timbuktoo to timbukthree listening to Tamil filmi music from the late 70s/ early 80s.
And you pick that Clown Drake over our Machoman Mason, when you get a chance? And what is it with picking that bozo Pongo ( I don’t have a complaint with your choice of comrade Gally) and no mention of my pal, comrade Psmith?
-BBG
BBG / March 24th, 2007, 2:02 pm / #
BBG: Thank you, I think. And I take strong exception to this maligning of dear Paul and even dearer Pongo. As for Psmith, I’m afraid it’s not him, it’s me. I’d love to remain friends, though…
DoZ / March 29th, 2007, 10:59 pm / #
A lot of similarities here. I used to like Psmith though. Rhett Butler was a big one too.
When I used to read “gangly and loose-limbed”, I used to think apes.
munimma / March 30th, 2007, 1:41 pm / #
Ned, Paul Drake, Frank Hardy….I’m there!
Soooo right abt Nancy’s thick-skulled detection techniques. Ned was definetely saving grace…
Anonymous / April 9th, 2007, 3:26 am / #
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